Sherlock & Co SIGN

Ugh, there's an new Easter movie called King of Kings that uses Charles Dickens to narrate the Biblical story of Jesus. Yet another thing from Angel Studios, and I guess they want to expand Dickens from his hold on Christmas to Easter also. I mean fine, he was a Christian, but the original book was private, meant for his family only, and he specifically forbade publication. This reads like the Dickens descendants doing a cash grab, and the animation looks ugly. But of course it's doing great at the box office, and most everything else out lately is horror movies or gimmicky thrillers. I'm so sick of this crap.

And the news remains awful and scary. So I'm trying find escape in shows and books, but the Sherlock & Co podcast continues to irritate. I finished the ten part SIGN case, and I see what the writer was trying to do, but he needs an editor. The case is still bloated, and I wish they had cut some of the rambling speeches by Jonathan Small. And the scene where Watson replays audio and catches Small in a lie; I got the clue the first time. Why does he have to sit there and replay the clips 3 or 4 times? Plus they could have cut Holmes's rambling deductions about the jewel guy Bernie; let Wiggins just threaten him again to force the guy to talk. Several choices could have been made that would have condensed the show and improved the pace, but no, they want to stretch everything out.

SPOILERS BELOW

They do some interesting things in the story, making Mary Morstan and Sholto mixed race, referencing how British and Indians did mix during the British Raj, and that they would have ancestry there. Plus they use the actual Pondicherry in India rather than Pondicherry Lodge where John Sholto hid the treasure. They also change Tonga from a racist depiction of a savage pygmy islander to an Indian boy who somehow got recruited by the Sign of Four gang, but they never clarify why they recruited him and what the money was for. He stole the music box and the diamond, so what did he ever hand over to the Four that they would have paid him for? Why couldn't Small contrive some reason to get into Mary's house to steal the music box himself? It feels like they use Tonga's kidnapping as plot device only, and they never check back in with Tonga's mother Prisha, even though she's the client of the case. Where's the urgency of the kidnap plot, if we take fucking 10 episodes to solve it? And I hate how they outright steal the music box from Tonga's secret crawlspace and never tell Prisha, who must be worried sick about her son. They want to hide the evidence from the police, and yet in the end they do work with the police and Interpol, so why not tell Prisha at that point? Why not ever ask her about Aurora and see if she knew what it was? Jonathan Small was more eager to consult Tonga's family than Sherlock was.

Even Sherlock forgets that Mary Morstan is NOT the client by part 3; he accuses Watson of "sexual advances on a client." She's not the bloody client! You've forgotten Prisha completely because you want the story to be all about Mary Morstan and the diamonds, and her war trauma in Afghanistan. And you want to travel to India to have adventures and meet Interpol. And you bloody lose Forrester's dog Toby. You're just supposed to lose the scent, not lose the fucking dog. It's a wonder the police didn't kick you off the case. They bring up Wiggins and the Irregulars but again nothing comes of it. So much running around being useless, like it wants to be BBC Sherlock--all flashy style and no substance. The mystery is all dead-ends and frustrations until Watson finally gets the clue, but instead of just telling the cops to arrest the guy, you have to have a stupid rambling dinner at the flat. Uh, is Tonga's safety urgent or not?! And Small keeps talking about legacy and what he's owed, but the fucking British East India Company was in Victorian times. You're not from the 19th Century, Small. What the fuck does that have to do with you? At least make the motive about more modern history, like the Partition or something.

And fuck John and Sherlock for running into Singh's house without the police. You got a car ride from them and you just run ahead? And the police don't catch up until after you've made speeches about fear and rescued a dog? And they just hang back with the dogs, and still don't arrive until after you've rescued the boy from fire and killed a guy with a chandelier? What the fuck! I don't need Sherlock & John to be action adventurers when the police are right fucking there, and should be used to rescue the boy. Like, Tonga was totally right to be suspicious of a complete stranger Watson showing up, and not even saying, "your mother sent me to find you; I'm a detective." No instead he has to give his podcaster speech in a total nonsequitor while Tonga passes out. The story needs to make sense to the characters, not just be fanservice to the audience. Still no check in with Prisha, their actual client, at the end. No asking Tonga about his kidnapping ordeal.

All we get is more Mary Morstan. I know it's a tragedy, and you have sad little bookends about her father telling her the Pondicherry Princess story. But why did Captain Morstan take the diamond in the first place and keep it in the music box? Why didn't he take it back to the cave himself if he wanted to do the right thing? And it doesn't make sense that he never explained to his daughter what she had to do with the music box or told Sholto to tell her what she had to do. And if returning the big diamond to India is so important for heritage and such, then why the fuck does John get to give a diamond to his friend Stammo for an engagement ring? Oh, so Tonga isn't allowed to keep the diamond and give it to his girlfriend Aurora, but Stammo gets to keep one? The whole thing is built up, only to end on a joke. The anti-colonial sentiment is real hollow there. Fuck these podcast writers.