Can't have nice things

The accusation against George Takei is so damn distressing. Takei denies it, and yet there's apparently some audio of him on Howard Stern's show talking about grabbing somebody. (aside--Howard Stern's sense of humor as yucky as ever.) The accuser's account is so damn detailed, and he wants nothing but an apology, and he was outraged by Takei's response about Kevin Spacey. Many people are still defending and trusting Takei, but I think of Louis C.K.'s confession, admitting that his fans admired him so much that they would attack any accusers. I think of the years that no one believed Cosby's victims because they thought he was a wonderful father figure. I don't want to be blindly in denial just because I don't want the accusation to be true, just because I look to Takei as a hero, an icon, an activist. Just because I like his politics, and loved his Broadway show about Japanese internment.

I have to remember that a man can be good and right about some things, but completely terrible about others. That it's dangerous to invest your heart and ideals in a man you don't really know, but only admire from afar. I remember when I was a kid I loved Thomas Jefferson so much, knowing that he owned slaves, and there were rumors about him and Sally Hemings. I made excuses for him, looking to his statements about the evils of slavery, about him trying to put it in the Declaration of Independence, about him being a kind master. Because for some reason I could accept some contradictions about him being a man of his time, but I didn't want to think he was SUCH a complicit hypocrite that he would actually father Sally's children. But after the DNA evidence in the 1990s, I gave up such illusions, and so did most Jefferson scholars. I don't want to live in stubborn denial, just because I don't want an allegation to be true. Just because I find it heartbreaking and disappointing.

I don't know how to feel about Takei now. Ironically, I wanted his character to recur on Fresh Off The Boat, and apparently he is in the upcoming Thanksgiving episode. Be careful what you wish for? I have to always remember the painful lesson, that humans can be myopic bastards, thinking themselves heroes instead of villains, even when they do villainous things. Even people we love, look to as leaders and role models, can be secretly garbage. Heck, even when people are known to be rapists, like Roman Polanski, they will still have admirers praising them and working with them. Talking about separating the man from his art. Everyone has to make that choice for themselves, where they draw the line of what to boycott. I still have to make mine about Takei.